Lead a successful life. This is what I aim for in life. But what is the definition of successful?

In life, we are often faced with ups and downs. Lately, although I am happy in most aspects of my life, but yesterday, i suddenly feel i am a failure. I could not even know what my sister is undergoing, I could not even advise her. And what's more, I do not know how to communicate or even let her listen to me. It's like so difficuilt to teach a young teenager these days.

I am behaving more and more like an adult. I worry the kind of friends she made, I worry she will mix with the wrong company. Cos of this, I start to always find out where she is, when she is back. Suddenly I realised, this is what my parents did to me when i was younger. I get worried when she is home too late, worried that she did not study enough.

Suddenly I realised, actually being a brother / gd parent is really not easy. You try to care for them, but they feel that you are very irritating and intruding their private life. That was how i felt when i was a teenager too.

Sometimes, being responsible is not good too. I am quite tired honestly. I do not know what to do.

I had this v wierd wish these few days, and that is to erase clean all my memory. Just feel like knocking down by a car, or just knock in the head by a robber. Forget everything.

Very crazy in deed. But I know this is not a solution. It is just escaping reality.

Till the day she learn....... I guess I just got to be the BAD person in her eyes. Some day she will understand my intentions....

sister, we all luv u ok? pls grow up.